Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde

*This is a very long post

I used to really dislike going to my Dad's office parties. Partially because there were never anyone of my age and secondly I didn't understand the need for me to be there. Specially during my late teens, I used to detest going to these parties. Since my Dad worked as a Brew Master (he made beer), alcoholic beverages never fell short. Unfortunately, I don't drink and hence could never make use of this unlimited supply of beer.

During one of these boring parties (I think I was around 19 then), I had grabbed one of my favourite orange drinks and was generally looking for a quiet place to sit and waste my time away, when I came across a bunch of kids ranging from, I guess 8 to 14. They were kind enough to invite me to join the "bachcha party" and I gladly obliged, in spite of the fact, that I knew I would be soon bored out of my wits.

It was fun talking with the kids about school, books and cartoons. At times, it's fun to talk to kids. It reminds me how different our look towards life was then, how different our worries were. Worrying about homework, scheming excuses for uncompleted work, worrying about exams. These worries seem so inconsequential now and yet at their age, they were extremely genuine problems.

We were talking about classics they were being asked to read at school and how they found stories like Tom Sawyer, Robinson Crusoe and Count of Monte Cristo interesting while they found stories by Charles Dickens extremely boring and depressing. I was telling them about stories I liked as a kid, about Sherlock Holmes, Asterix and Tintin. Things were going pretty nice till I mentioned about "Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde".

I had noticed that one of the kids was pretty quiet. He must have been around 14 - 15 I guess. He wasn't talking much, though he kept looking at me. Apart from the basic introduction, the only thing he had asked me was "Bhaiya, how come you are not drinking like the rest? Is it because your parents are here?"  I told him that I didn't like the taste of any of the drinks and that I didn't like the idea of losing control over myself. He just smiled and nodded. The next words I heard from him were "I don't like that story", when I mentioned Jekyll & Hyde. I asked him why but all he did was smile and and said, "I'll tell you later." I didn't push him about it and soon we started talking about other stuff.

I had left them and was talking to some of the management trainees of the company (they were a little closer to my age group) when I saw the kid walk up to me.

"You know why I don't like the story of Jekyll and Mr Hyde?"
"Nope. Why don't you like it?"
He whispers to me, "I know Dr. Jekyll."
I was taken by surprise, "What?"
"I know a guy who is like Dr Jekyll."He points to a guy and asks, "Do you know him?"
"Isnt he your Dad?"
"Yes! He is like Dr Jekyll!"

I didn't understand what he was getting at. I said, "I am sorry, I don't understand what you are trying to say."
We walked to an empty area and sat down and he started explaining.
"You know how in the story, Dr. Jekyll is a nice guy, but then when he drinks that potion he makes, he becomes Mr Hyde and does bad things?"
"Yes"
"My Dad is like that. He is a nice man but when he drinks he becomes like Mr. Hyde."

I was totally shocked. I had never looked at the story from that angle and suddenly it was crystal clear. The story was such a beautiful metaphor for alcoholism. A normal man, consumes alcohol and turns into a beast. What could be simpler?

He continued, "Whenever he drinks a lot, he changes in to this person I am really scared of. He becomes angry for no reason, his eye's become red, and he talks in a funny way. I don't like him when he gets drunk. He fights with mom and screams at her. At times he falls down and hurts himself. I don't like it when people laugh and make jokes about him behind his back when he is drunk. I don't like those uncles who makes him drink more".

I glanced at his Dad. I had met him numerous times but never knew that he had a drinking problem. He was a very nice and respected man. I had spoken to him numerous times. A very jolly, interesting person. I couldn't imagine him like the way the kid explained.
"How long has this been going on?"
"I don't know. Ever since I remember. Always I guess."
"Haven't you spoken to him?"
"I don't feel like talking about it when he is not drunk. And I don't think he listens when he is drunk."
"Do you dislike your Dad?"
"No. I love him. He loves mom and me a lot. But I don't know what happens to him when he drinks. I have seen mother cry too but I don't know what to do."

I did not know what to tell him. I don't know why he was telling me all this but I had no idea what to tell him. I did not know what to ask him, whether it would be intrusion on privacy.
"Has he ever hit your mother?"
"I don't know. I go to my room and sit. I can only hear them shout. I used to cry when I was a kid but now I don't feel like it. At times he comes to my room to talk to me when he is drunk. But I feel too scared to hear what he says. I just pray that he goes away. Sometimes I pretend to sleep. Then he doesn't stay. He goes away."
"Don't you think you should talk to him and tell him that you are scared? That you do not like him like that." I asked.
"I don't know how to. I talk to mom. Mom talks to him. He doesn't drink for a week and then starts again."

I was caught in a very weird situation. I felt sad at the kid's state. He was caught between loving Jekyll and being scared of Hyde. Two sides of the same coin. And yet I didn't know how to help him. I think he probably understood my precarious situation. He smiled and said,
"Don't worry. I just wanted to tell you why I don't like the story. I am used to it now. We are all used to it now. He is changing slowly. I believe he'll change one day. And I have promised my Mom, that I'll never be like him. I'll make sure that my wife and kids don't go through the same thing."
I stared at him at disbelief, at his maturity in handling the situation while he stood up.
"I have to go now. I think my parents are leaving."

I bid him goodbye and looked at him go and join his parents. There were a million things running through my head. It's funny how the person drinking never realizes how he is affecting the people he his around, people who love him and care for him. I was amazed at the kids maturity. He must have gone through so much of quiet mental abuse (maybe indirectly) and yet he has kept a check of what is right and what is wrong. Or maybe he is still confused about the whole thing. He just knows the cause of all his problems and he has decided that he will not create them for others.

Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde has never been the same for me ever since. I have not met him since then. I hope he turned out well. It took a 14 year old kid to show me a very different side of life. I think he is one of the reasons that I have abstained from drinks. I politely decline when people try to convince me to drink. I could never explain them my reasons, I things some lessons are to be learnt from 14 year olds kids only.